Face to face I close my eyes and feel your breath against my cheek. This electric energy that is SO palpable between us, this is what I have missed. When we strip everything else away and nothing else matters but being in that moment with you, this is what I have wanted.
It is far too easy to get too busy or take each other for granted, but this is what I remembered was there, buried underneath.
Remember in the beginning when we simply stood near one another with our palms barely only close to touching and there was this sudden rush and we would both break out into chill bumps? Remember when a small flash of the night before would bring that familiar punch in the gut, that deep ache that seemingly comes from out of nowhere?
Still, when I think of you, when we take the time to re-connect, even after all these years together, I still get them.
There is more to a life together than a compilation of these moments and a vow of love.
You have challenged me in ways I never would have imagined. You make me look at myself and take responsibility for things I had never considered. You have taught me fierce independence tempered with togetherness. You teach me to let go of the all too present fears.
A “real” life is filled with cyclic concerns over money and bills and raising children and daily chores and job stresses. No one said this would always be easy.
We are not always victims of these things. There are windows that capture the true reality of being with you. There are still moments when all of that goes away and there is a recognition and remembrance of the connection that binds us together. It is spiritual as much as it is sexual. I am forever grateful for these moments and these reminders that take place when I need them the most.
Thank you for continually taking the chance on me. Thank you for being my teacher, my lover, my absolute very best friend. Thank you for opening up and tearing down those protective defenses you needed far into your past. You don’t need them anymore. Thank you for showing me how to greet the day and the importance of gratitude for every breath.
I get you, I GOT you. You are safe. You are needed.
I love you, today and always.
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I am a 43 year old mother of 3, living in Florida with my partner and youngest child. Like the mythological phoenix, I have been reborn out of the ashes of my former way of life and have, for the last several years, set out on an exploration of self expression through visual art and creative writing. I am immensely grateful to feel a part of every living thing in existence and the emergence of a growing evolution of consciousness within and throughout. I am interested in all aspects of energy healing and spiritual transformation and have just recently become a student of Reiki. I understand there is always a choice and I try to choose love over fear at every turn. I am grateful for all of the other women in this group and for their ever present support and guidance. Jennifer Bothast