Letting go of the familiar, breaking out of comfort zones…these things are the hurdles overcome by heroes. This is especially true if the habit or comfort zone is well set into the established confines of your daily existence. It takes great faith and strength to peel back those comfortable layers to expose the wounds of the past and allow a new birth to occur.
I wrote this poem and created the painting (seen in the inserted image here) as a means of expressing the sloughing off of the winter of my days and allowing a new kind of existence to begin. As I started over in nearly every aspect of my life, it was painful to say the least, but it was a new kind of freedom, a rebirth, a kind of unfolding of spring.
THE UNFOLDING OF SPRING
Hard and heavy crusts of dry bark peel back
Like worn scars and starved scabs turned black
The old coats for winter are put away in the closet again
I sit still between shadows and invite the light to touch my skin.
The mid-day sun collects pools of sweat gathering in my pores
I want it to wash away old habits, so-called sins from their core
Please baptize me in ribbons of sticky glue
Hold me tight in rhythms of puzzle pieces in greens and blue
Please remind me of the taste of honeysuckle in the rain
I’m so tired of being splayed from worn rules in the illusions of this game
Having been made mute by fear, the voice in my throat bubbles and strains
Chapped lips are peeled back, stretched forward in truths made vain.
I smell and taste the acid stains of orange and red hues
It’s the blood-like sulfur of forgiveness on my tongue that stings
These traces of ego are swallowed in this grateful unfolding of Spring
Hush in this moment! Look at this melting of me
born into you.
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I am a 42 year old mother of 3, living in Florida with my partner and youngest child. Like the mythological phoenix, I have been reborn out of the ashes of my former way of life and have, for the last several years, set out on an exploration of self expression through visual art and creative writing. I am immensely grateful to feel a part of every living thing in existence and the emergence of a growing evolution of consciousness within and throughout. I am interested in all aspects of energy healing and spiritual transformation and have just recently become a student of Reiki. I understand there is always a choice and I try to choose love over fear at every turn. I am grateful for all of the other women in this group and for their ever present support and guidance. Jennifer Bothast